babyMaternity Magazine
Creative Child

12 Ways to Support a New Mom

by Sarah Lyons

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Let her shower

A new mom may feel she doesn’t have time for basic things like a shower, rest, or time to eat a meal. One of the simplest ways to help a new mom is to hold the baby and watch the other children while she eats lunch, enjoys a relaxing shower, or takes a short nap. When mom is rested, fed, and freshened up, it can really make her feel ready to take on the rest of the day.

Help with the older kids

Show support by offering to pick up the older kids, even if it’s just for a couple hours. If you are taking your own children to the park, swing by and pick up her’s for the afternoon. This gets them out of the house and gives mom a break. Driving the kids to school or activities is also a big help for a family with a new baby. Time alone with baby may be just what mom needs.

Ask about her birth story

Giving birth is a huge milestone, an experience no mom will ever forget. Every birth has a story and many times, there aren’t a lot of chances to tell it. Ask about her birth story and listen. Becoming a mom is a joyful, stressful, awe inspiring, and life changing experience. Telling the birth story helps women to process and embrace this new journey.

Bring a gift for mom

Many people bring gifts for the baby, but mom is usually the one doing all the work. Bring a snack or treat for mom to enjoy. Other great gifts are ones that pamper mom or make her feel beautiful and comfortable in her postpartum body. Lotion, perfume, a new nightgown, or slippers are some good ideas. A delivery of flowers is another great way to bring cheer and make mom feel special.

Don’t stay too long

Families who have newborns generally like to have company, especially if they pitch in around the house and with the kids. However, don’t overstay your welcome. New parents tire easily. Visit the family, bring a meal, and help out but watch for clues from mom as to when the family would like some alone time.

Take her somewhere

Mom may not be able to drive for a few weeks after birth. Offer to take her on errands or just out for coffee. Being able to get out of the house can do wonders for someone’s attitude.

Don’t give advice

An important tip for anyone chatting with a new mom is to listen but don’t give advice unless you are asked. It can be frustrating and overwhelming to get unsolicited advice from everyone she bumps into.

It’s important to ask mom what would help her. Would she prefer to have help with housework? Would she like you to hold the baby while she gets some things done? Some moms would prefer to have someone to chat with for awhile and some moms may want to get out of the house for a bit. Offer several options and see what sounds most appealing to the new mom. Any offer to help is always appreciated by a family adjusting to having a new baby in the house.

Sarah Lyons is a stay at home wife and mother of six children, including 18 month old triplets. Using creative consequences with her kids has improved their behavior and encourages healthy relationships with each other.

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